Today is October 29th and coincidentally I am exactly 29 weeks! Very odd. I like today not because anything special has ever happened on it but because it is the day before some great things/changes have happened in my life. Things that have changed the course of our lives. I think of the what ifs and if I hadn't done some of these things how different my life could be right now.
11 years ago today I didn't know my life was about 24 hours away from the most exciting police ride along LPD has ever had for an intern and meeting the man of my dreams/future husband/my babies daddy. (And here I thought about canceling and not going.)
7 years ago today K and I carved a ton of pumpkins for our upcoming Halloween party. Little did I know that one of the ones I carved in 24ish hours would hold the most beautiful engagement ring as K proposed to me on the front porch.
6 years ago K and I were at our wedding rehearsal then onto dinner with our family and friends as we prepared for the big day.
4 years ago K and I sat at a Denver Broncos game watching out team get beat in the last minute by the Colts who would go on to win the Super Bowl that season.
3 years ago K and I were at our 1st Monday night football game and watched Denver get beat in overtime by the Packers. And no Farve didn't take the team to the super bowl that year. After the game we spent a lot of time discussing the rest of the paperwork we needed to finish and the decisions we needed to make to get the adoption process started. A new journey that was awaiting us.
This year I sit here amazed at my little round belly that is bouncing away with kicks from our baby girl. I can't imagine that in 11ish weeks I will be holding her. Amazing how a police ride along 11 years ago leads to all of this.
Friday, October 29, 2010
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Relaxation and Meditation!
This week I had my monthly acupuncture appointment. I love going. It's like a mini advice session if you are dealing with any issues, then of course the needles and relaxation. I really feel that part of my journey with acupuncture is what made our IVF cycle successful. I know a lot of people think it's hocus pocus but it does teach you to release unnecessary stress and go to your happy place and I really like the holistic process of healing if possible.
So here is a little more background on my acupuncture and our journey.
Before I started acupuncture I had been doing some self pressure point applications or whatever you want to call it and starting to meditate but wasn't really getting it or figuring out how to relax and release. Next I started with 13 moons which helped but I still felt like I wasn't releasing enough. I started reading a couple of books that Donna recommended and within them I was led to a website call Anji on here she had 2 free meditations which I started doing and a newsletter that I signed up to receive. So I began reading her stuff, doing her meditations and tapping points. The meditations were helping but while reading through her emails and the stories of past patients I kept seeing a pattern of breakthrough, where patients had an aha moment of what was holding them back. I had yet to figure that out but I knew it had to be something. So around January 1st when I was in the whole job crisis situation, I decided to journal about my journey. Now I am not a diary writer at all so it was kind of hard at first. I started with where my journey started. Getting my period. And that is where I had my aha moment. Without going into all the details I realized I had/have a very negative attitude towards my uterus. I hated her, called her names on a regular basis, threatened to have her removed. (I know some of you are rolling the eyes but whatever). Anyways, with this realization, I felt I did have my breakthrough. I started trying to change my attitude, talk nicer, etc, etc. And I felt a sense of change. My meditations and relaxation sessions became much better and I was able to focus on the goal of everything. So fast forward to March and us beginning our IVF cycle I ordered a special meditation CD just for the IVF cycle this was probably one of the best things I did. While this should have been the most stressful 2 months of my life with a new job, quota, upcoming sale, IVF etc., listening to that CD every night was incredibly relaxing. I would be sound asleep within minutes of it finishing if not sooner rather than laying in bed half the night wondering if this procedure was going to work. And no I didn't make K listen to it. I put it on my ipod and just put headphones in. So today I continue to meditate and use the relaxation techniques I learned above. I hope they will help in during labor and in life in general to know when to release the things I cannot control.
So here is a little more background on my acupuncture and our journey.
Before I started acupuncture I had been doing some self pressure point applications or whatever you want to call it and starting to meditate but wasn't really getting it or figuring out how to relax and release. Next I started with 13 moons which helped but I still felt like I wasn't releasing enough. I started reading a couple of books that Donna recommended and within them I was led to a website call Anji on here she had 2 free meditations which I started doing and a newsletter that I signed up to receive. So I began reading her stuff, doing her meditations and tapping points. The meditations were helping but while reading through her emails and the stories of past patients I kept seeing a pattern of breakthrough, where patients had an aha moment of what was holding them back. I had yet to figure that out but I knew it had to be something. So around January 1st when I was in the whole job crisis situation, I decided to journal about my journey. Now I am not a diary writer at all so it was kind of hard at first. I started with where my journey started. Getting my period. And that is where I had my aha moment. Without going into all the details I realized I had/have a very negative attitude towards my uterus. I hated her, called her names on a regular basis, threatened to have her removed. (I know some of you are rolling the eyes but whatever). Anyways, with this realization, I felt I did have my breakthrough. I started trying to change my attitude, talk nicer, etc, etc. And I felt a sense of change. My meditations and relaxation sessions became much better and I was able to focus on the goal of everything. So fast forward to March and us beginning our IVF cycle I ordered a special meditation CD just for the IVF cycle this was probably one of the best things I did. While this should have been the most stressful 2 months of my life with a new job, quota, upcoming sale, IVF etc., listening to that CD every night was incredibly relaxing. I would be sound asleep within minutes of it finishing if not sooner rather than laying in bed half the night wondering if this procedure was going to work. And no I didn't make K listen to it. I put it on my ipod and just put headphones in. So today I continue to meditate and use the relaxation techniques I learned above. I hope they will help in during labor and in life in general to know when to release the things I cannot control.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
What did you just ask me?
I have found that while being pregnant people ask you some of the strangest most personal questions ever. Maybe this is normal but to me it's kind of rude. If you know me in real life you know I have a pretty sarcastic personality so I've thought of a few good responses or I just attempt to avoid the questions. Here are my top 3 so far. Comments in parenthesis are my thoughts.
1. How much weight have you gained? This was asked by my mother in law while eating dinner with them. Conversation went like this:
MIL: How much weight have you gained?
FIL: That is rude, you shouldn't ask those types of questions?
Me: I'm practically choking on my Chinese trying to think of a good answer.
MIL: Well, I want to know.
K: ummm, not much... trying to stall
FIL: You are being rude!
ME: maybe 20 pounds (like I'm gonna tell you my exact weight lady!)
MIL: hmpf
2. Are you going to breastfeed? I mean seriously, I'm 20ish weeks pregnant what am I supposed to look down at my boobs and ask them if they are going to produce milk and if so for how long? Then ask my baby if she will have any allergies and even be able to drink my milk. Ugh. Now with this question, I have found you have to watch your answer. If you say I don't know then for some reason that gives said questioner some magical permission to lecture you on why you should breastfeed. Now this drives me bonkers. Since we were on the path to adoption I never expected to have the opportunity to breastfeed, my babies would be formula fed, I was completely fine with that and still am if that happens to be the case. I really hate how society tries to guilt trip a mother into feeling bad if she can't or chooses not to breastfeed. All of the BS of a child will be smarter or healthier is ridiculous. I have plenty of friends who did whose kids are constantly sick and I have plenty of friends who chose not to...not even just 1 or 2 feedings and their kids are freaking smart! Some people wear their breastfeeding status around like it's a badge of honor like it makes them a better parent.
3. What type of birth are you going to have? Now this question is my favorite and involves the in laws again. So in the middle of the big guns and hoses boxing match I decided to go say hi to the IL's as we weren't sitting with them. So I wander over during a fight. After a couple of hellos....
MIL: What type of birth are you going to have (mind you this is in the middle of a fight and you can hardly hear anything due to the noise of the crowd).
Me: WHAT!!!?????? (did she really just ask me what I think she asked me?)
MIL: What type of birth are you planning to have?
Me: What are you talking about?
MIL: Are you going to do Lamaze?
Me: Lamaze??? (said with a very puzzled look on my face, I still can't believe she is asking me this in the middle of a fight and in front of all these people they are sitting with).
MIL: Yes, the Lamaze breathing, are you going to do that?
Me: I don't know (I said that with tons of sarcasm while looking at her like she is crazy)
I quickly said goodbye and headed back to my table.
So why do people want to know what type of birth I'm going to have? Like it has any affect on them. I do know the whole "natural" birth is very popular and everyone wants to give their opinion but I just don't care. Now when people ask me I tell them I am having the type of birth where I show up at the hospital and my baby girl is born either natural, pushed, or cut out of me either with drugs or without, I don't care, I just want her out safely. That usually shuts them up. My OB asked me the other day if I was going to take a birthing class, I asked her if she was going to make me to which she said no. I told her my plan and she just laughed and said it sounded good to her and that she and a nurse will be there. Exactly that's all I need and that's why I pay her the big bucks.
1. How much weight have you gained? This was asked by my mother in law while eating dinner with them. Conversation went like this:
MIL: How much weight have you gained?
FIL: That is rude, you shouldn't ask those types of questions?
Me: I'm practically choking on my Chinese trying to think of a good answer.
MIL: Well, I want to know.
K: ummm, not much... trying to stall
FIL: You are being rude!
ME: maybe 20 pounds (like I'm gonna tell you my exact weight lady!)
MIL: hmpf
2. Are you going to breastfeed? I mean seriously, I'm 20ish weeks pregnant what am I supposed to look down at my boobs and ask them if they are going to produce milk and if so for how long? Then ask my baby if she will have any allergies and even be able to drink my milk. Ugh. Now with this question, I have found you have to watch your answer. If you say I don't know then for some reason that gives said questioner some magical permission to lecture you on why you should breastfeed. Now this drives me bonkers. Since we were on the path to adoption I never expected to have the opportunity to breastfeed, my babies would be formula fed, I was completely fine with that and still am if that happens to be the case. I really hate how society tries to guilt trip a mother into feeling bad if she can't or chooses not to breastfeed. All of the BS of a child will be smarter or healthier is ridiculous. I have plenty of friends who did whose kids are constantly sick and I have plenty of friends who chose not to...not even just 1 or 2 feedings and their kids are freaking smart! Some people wear their breastfeeding status around like it's a badge of honor like it makes them a better parent.
3. What type of birth are you going to have? Now this question is my favorite and involves the in laws again. So in the middle of the big guns and hoses boxing match I decided to go say hi to the IL's as we weren't sitting with them. So I wander over during a fight. After a couple of hellos....
MIL: What type of birth are you going to have (mind you this is in the middle of a fight and you can hardly hear anything due to the noise of the crowd).
Me: WHAT!!!?????? (did she really just ask me what I think she asked me?)
MIL: What type of birth are you planning to have?
Me: What are you talking about?
MIL: Are you going to do Lamaze?
Me: Lamaze??? (said with a very puzzled look on my face, I still can't believe she is asking me this in the middle of a fight and in front of all these people they are sitting with).
MIL: Yes, the Lamaze breathing, are you going to do that?
Me: I don't know (I said that with tons of sarcasm while looking at her like she is crazy)
I quickly said goodbye and headed back to my table.
So why do people want to know what type of birth I'm going to have? Like it has any affect on them. I do know the whole "natural" birth is very popular and everyone wants to give their opinion but I just don't care. Now when people ask me I tell them I am having the type of birth where I show up at the hospital and my baby girl is born either natural, pushed, or cut out of me either with drugs or without, I don't care, I just want her out safely. That usually shuts them up. My OB asked me the other day if I was going to take a birthing class, I asked her if she was going to make me to which she said no. I told her my plan and she just laughed and said it sounded good to her and that she and a nurse will be there. Exactly that's all I need and that's why I pay her the big bucks.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Best Shower Ever!
I had my first shower over the weekend. It was more than I could have ever dreamed of. Absolutely perfect. Why? Mainly because I never thought I would have a shower. Figured we would adopt and have a little get together come see the baby and be done with it. But obviously that was not the case. So what made this shower so special? Well the main thing is that it was in my favorite theme of pumpkins and they were all painted pink and white with ribbons, polka dots, etc. They were so cute. The food was wonderful. Thank you to my dear friend J-he did a fabulous job. The cake was amazing. Made by SugarGirl Cakes. We even had yummy apple crisps and pumpkin bars made by Tis So Sweet Bake Shoppe. Special fall drinks for those expecting and those who were not. And little martini glasses filled with some of my favorite candies. I could go on and on but I'll just post a few photos. Then of course all of the wonderful gifts Baby W got. I can already tell she will be very spoiled by our friends and family.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Officially a stay at home wife!
Yesterday was my last day of work. It was so strange but I know the right decision. So today is my first day of being able to sleep in, rest and relax. Of course this morning I was up at 5am unable to sleep so I got up and got a bunch of things done around the house. Our home inspection is today and my mom is arriving. I'm excited to spend some time with her and not have to worry about the sale at the same time. And mainly so we can finish some of the small details of the nursery and of course go shopping. She is my favorite shopping buddy.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Last Day Tomorrow
Tomorrow is my last day. It's so weird. Normally when I quit a job I am either moving or going to another job. Granted I've only quit about 4 jobs in my entire life. But after tomorrow my job is to be a stay at home wife for a few months then a stay at home mom. It will be quite the adjustment for me. Essentially it is what I have always wanted, it is just kind of scary that the time has actually come and this is all really happening.
It's weird for me to look back and think exactly 6 years ago last Saturday, K and I both had our bachelor/ette parties and I had my shower and this weekend I will be having my baby shower. Something I thought I wouldn't have given everything we have gone through over the years. I am very excited to share the occasion with my friends and family.
On a completely different note, last week I decided to check on refinancing our house. We were able to lock in a rate of 3.75% for a 15 year loan and if we continue to pay our new loan at the rate we are currently paying it would be paid off in less than 10 years. My goal is to pay it off before the 15 at least. So excited to know that the house will be paid for before I turn 46 and before our little girl starts driving. We also are finally going to be getting our woodwork redone and new wood doors (the ones that have been sitting in the basement for 3 years) stained and installed. After that my next project is our retaining wall then the dreaded bathroom. I swear we go in spurts of getting a bunch of things done then resting a year or so before we start anymore major projects. Our house is 50 years old and we have lived here for 8 so I feel like we are on a good track of getting things done. Woodwork, retaining wall, driveway, bathroom, kitchen and basement are all that we have left, then by that time something we fixed originally will break and we'll start the cycle over again.
It's weird for me to look back and think exactly 6 years ago last Saturday, K and I both had our bachelor/ette parties and I had my shower and this weekend I will be having my baby shower. Something I thought I wouldn't have given everything we have gone through over the years. I am very excited to share the occasion with my friends and family.
On a completely different note, last week I decided to check on refinancing our house. We were able to lock in a rate of 3.75% for a 15 year loan and if we continue to pay our new loan at the rate we are currently paying it would be paid off in less than 10 years. My goal is to pay it off before the 15 at least. So excited to know that the house will be paid for before I turn 46 and before our little girl starts driving. We also are finally going to be getting our woodwork redone and new wood doors (the ones that have been sitting in the basement for 3 years) stained and installed. After that my next project is our retaining wall then the dreaded bathroom. I swear we go in spurts of getting a bunch of things done then resting a year or so before we start anymore major projects. Our house is 50 years old and we have lived here for 8 so I feel like we are on a good track of getting things done. Woodwork, retaining wall, driveway, bathroom, kitchen and basement are all that we have left, then by that time something we fixed originally will break and we'll start the cycle over again.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)