Where does the time go?

Uh, it's been almost 2 months since my last post!  The preparation and actual Consignment sale kept me pretty busy along with Lyra.  She is growing like crazy.  I think we are right on the verge of learning to laugh.  She does do a pretty good fake cough right now. This week K is away for training so I am hoping she doesn't find her laugh while he is gone.  We are also having Easter/3 month pictures taken this week. I booked them early in the morning when Lyra is normally her happiest. Lets hope she cooperates. 

An Exciting Week

Last week was a week of many firsts.  Lyra and I left the house for the first time just the two of us. We headed to Kohls and walmart for some fun shopping. Lyra also has started smiling at us.  That has to be one of the most exciting firsts. To see your baby smile back.  And then yesterday she discovered her hands and the concept of putting them in her mouth.  Now we just hear this obnoxious sucking sound constantly coming from her.  Kind of gross but neat at the same time.  All little milestones.  I really can't believe she is 6 weeks old. Time does fly by but we are enjoying every minute of it.  This week she will be attending her first Fish Fry then heading to the  Roncalli Alumni Basketball Tournament. Her dads status of playing is still up in the air. 

She finally sleeps!

About a week ago we were on the path to a schedule then poor Lyra caught a cold and we have gone to two parents with very little sleep and a little one who fights sleeping like she's gonna miss out on something, I guess she thinks we lead a very exciting life.  She will be dead asleep for 10 minutes then wide awake.  Not sure if it's the cold or her just going through a phase but I clearly could use a nap and K could use a good night of sleep since he really does need to be alert for his job.  So now after a trying day of no napping, Lyra is asleep in her high chair with a Pink CD blaring in the background, go figure.  It's days like this that I wish my my was close so I could call her to come over for a little bit.  Hopefully this little bug passes and we get back to our cycle of eating, sleeping, awake time. 

 One Month Old!

We went to visit the tax lady this week. No deduction for Lyra this year!

 

 Sometimes it's just more fun to sleep on the floor in front of your crib. 

Athena wasn't sure what to think of this.

Fake sleeping, she was wide awake 10 minutes later.

Asleep in the high chair!

Hello Spring!

Well for a day or so. Today it is absolutely gorgeous outside. Probably close to 70.  Windows are open and it's nice to get some fresh air in the house.  I took Lyra and Athena out for a walk.  Athena wasn't sure what to think of the stroller. She likes to lead but her leash wasn't long enough for her to walk in front of the stroller, so I tied it to the front of the stroller. I'm sure some will scold me for it but it worked great and Athena really listens to her commands, especially on a walk so we had no problems at all.  Now I did notice we have the worst sidewalks in our neighborhood. Bumpy! I'm sure Lyra could attest for that. She kept trying to go to sleep but just couldn't.  Hopefully they will level out a big when the ground completely warms up. 

Lyra is down for her nap so it's time to do some laundry and get Athena brushed down.

Welcome to the world Lyra!

Happy Valentine's Day! Lyra is 1 month old today so I can't think of any better way to celebrate other than finally sharing her birth story. 

Well here it is my exciting birth story-I really don't think it's that exciting but everyone wants to read it so that is why I'm sharing. And as everyone knows, I had no plan for this birth my goal was to get her out the best way possible, natural, drugged or c-section. I didn't read any books or go to any classes on how to have a baby, I figured I would figure it out when I got there and that the nurses would guide me through which they did. While this may seem long and drawn out to some or short and sweet to others, I wouldn't change anything for a second, I feel like I got to experience it all.

So we headed up to the hospital on January 13th at 7pm.  Checked in they put us in our room, came in asked us a million questions.  And around 8:30pm gave me dose #1 of the medicine to help prepare me for labor.  The plan was dose at 8:30pm, 12am, 4am, 6am shower and breakfast (note this was very important to me as breakfast is my favorite meal), pitocin at 7am, then deliver a baby. Sounded good to me. With the medicine they said I would have some mild cramping.

So we laid around the room and watched stupid TV, read the paper--my horoscope said I would be doing a lot of pushing the next day, hmmm???, ate lots of snacks from the snack room, watched stuff on our laptop. Pretty boring.  So around 11ish K decided to lay down to get some sleep and my nurse told me to try to sleep if possible. Kind of hard with all the wires strapped to you.  Around midnight the nurse came in, I was expecting my next pill but she said my contractions were way to close together and they were going to delay the dose and try to slow them down. At this point I still did not know I was having contractions. Just a little mild cramping that was about 4-5 minutes apart. I think I had the thought of "if this is a contraction what is the big deal?" I thought too soon. By about 2am the contractions were coming on strong and fast. While K slept I labored through (amazing how that breathing technique comes naturally) then by this point they were about 2-4 minutes apart and I was just extremely uncomfortable. I continued to labor through them till the nurse came in a at about 4am, she was a little surprised that I was laboring through them and how fast they were coming. So she called my doctor and they wanted to give me some IV drugs and hold off on the epidural. Fine. K woke up around 5am at this point I was really trying to hold out but I was in pain, so we called for the epidural around 5:20 and waited and waited. I told him that I bet they are going to make me wait till 6am.  So around 5:50 we called my nurse directly. She hadn't received the message (go figure) but put in the request asap and by 6:20 the epidural was in and I felt 100% better. I distinctly remember looking over at K and telling him that this was so much better and that I don't know why or how those girls go natural. (And I have a high pain tolerance). So I was finally able to sleep for about an hour. If you notice the time I didn't get a shower or breakfast.

Around 7am my new nurse came in, checked me and said it was time to start pitocin. I could also eat but it had to be clear stuff, jello, juice.  So I had a little of that then slept. Around 8:30am my doctor came in to check me and I had progressed, I think I was around a 10 for dilation but Lyra was still a stage one. As my nurse put it, stage 0, 1, 2, 3, 4 out the door. So they said I would have to do a lot of pushing. Okay, no biggee. K called our parents and told them to hold tight that we would be having a baby in about an hour or so we thought. Then they began prepping the room, in came the stuff for the baby, the tray with all the tools for delivery, it was getting exciting. I made K spoon feed me another jello real quick because I just felt like I needed some energy for this next stage. Then we were ready to push. So pushing began, my nurse and K were great. K giving positive encouragement and of course making me laugh with reminders of my horoscope. We pushed and pushed and pushed. After about an 1.5 hours of pushing we had made some progress she was between a 2 and a 3. But suddenly I had this excruciating pain in my left hip. I tried to ignore it, push through it but it was killing me, it hurt worse than the contractions from earlier. So they called for some more drugs and gave me something to see if that took the edge off. And we changed positions, it continued to get worse and I was pretty exhausted, I was sleeping in between contractions and even skipping a few pushes because the pain was so bad. My epidural seemed to be wearing off on the left. So next they gave me a buffer which felt good and my doctor showed up right after I got the buffer to check on me. So she checks me and says the baby is only at a 1 barely! WHAT??? Thought my nurse was gonna freak, she's was like I just checked her, so they both recheck and suddenly the baby had gone backwards. So the doctor says well 2 options, c-section or push for a couple more hours then possible c-section. Without a moment of pause I said c-section. My good nurse even tried to justify my decision by saying I was exhausted and could hardly stay awake through the pushes now. Later she commented on how calm I was when the decision was made, she said most girls kind of freak out when that option is brought up. I told her I was prepared for it and had a feeling it would end this way. Things start going really fast, at this point it's probably about Noon. So they called for me to get a 2nd load of drugs since my epidural was wearing off in my one leg, the only problem was they had just given me the buffer, I swear they said they were going to wait a little while which was about 2 minutes before they gave me my next dose. I felt good then! So my doctor suddenly decides she is going to shave me, I can tell my nurse is a little taken back by this because she keeps saying she can do it and that doctors never shave the patients.  I wasn't to worried till the doctor held up the razor and said am I doing this right? :-) Another nurse walks in the room throws K his little bio hazard suit and cap, they move me to a different bed and we are on our way with our herd of doctors, nurses and anesthesiologists to the surgery room. We get to the surgery room and they are prepping everything and counting tools. The anesthesiologists (there were 2 for some reason) keep cracking jokes and are trying to get us to tell them the name. In the mean time our nurse is yelling across the room that we better not tell them since we wouldn't tell her. They then swore we must be in the secret service because no one keeps it a secret that long. They obviously don't know me and how well I keep secrets. And here we go.

Doctor makes the cut, says "Oh, well that explains everything!" What we ask? "She is crooked", hence the hip pain, "she flipped over" so she was sunny side up and "her hands are on her face" totally a Lyra trait.  (At this moment I thanked God I decided to do the c-section and not try and push for 2 more hours). They yanked her out, she let out a some little cries, everyone oohed and aahed about how cute she was, I probably fell asleep for a few minutes (remember I'm drugged out of my mind by this time) as I kept coming in and out of consciousness. K finally brought her over and I could just see her little face. She was so cute with her pouty lips and bright eyes! One of the anesthesiologists took a few pictures for us.  I remember asking about her stats then it was time for her to go to the nursery and for them to finish up with me, K went with Lyra and I laid there cracking jokes with the doctors till they wheeled me back to my room gave me some more meds and I slept for about an hour. Lyra Alexandra was born on January 14th at 12:57pm, 7lbs 6.5 ounces, 20 inches long.

Back in recovery I woke up at about 2pm.  One of my first thoughts is darn my dad just went to work so I can't call him till later. My nurse informs me that K went to get something to eat then she asks me if I want to see Lyra but I have to assure her I can hold her without help in case she or K is not in the room. Okay, so we all know that I have waited for this moment FOREVER! and even though I was still really drugged I said bring her down I'll be fine. I took a few deep breaths, tried to focus my eyes so I was more convincing and figured I would just hold her tight even if I did fall back asleep. I needed to see her NOW! They brought her in and I held her for the next 2 hours. My special moment with her was at all of our local hospitals they play a little song when a baby is born, well most moms don't hear it because of labor, etc.  So right when they brought Lyra to me, the song went off and I just held her and looked into her eyes and said they were playing it right then for us. I just couldn't get over that this was my new reality and that it wasn't a dream. I wasn't going to wake up and have someone say fooled you. I was finally a mom. K showed back up and I continued to come out of my drugged state. At about 4pm they were ready to move me to my room.

One thing I told them in the beginning is that I get extremely motion sick well that little move 1 floor pretty much did the trick, soon as I got to the room I started getting sick. Let me tell you, puking with a cut stomach into a little kidney shaped bowl is no easy task. Basically I just kept puking on myself. Finally, the nurses got tired of bringing me new gowns every 5 minutes that they just brought me a huge stack. I went through all of them. At this point my mom and K's parents came up.  I have no clue how long any of them stayed.  I kept trying to eat but that was not going well. I was still pretty drugged and puking and the itching was about to start. According to my mom I was literally scratching my face off (I never did have any scratch marks though). The nurses finally gave me some benadryl to stop that and around midnight I went to sleep.  It's amazing how a mothers instinct can kick right in at least for me it did even on drugs.  Lucky for me Lyra latched like she'd been breastfeeding for months instead of hours which made that process a lot better than I expected.  I will admit I held Lyra majority of that first night. I just didn't want to let her go and I knew we would have visitors all day Saturday who would hold her. About 4am on Saturday I was finally able to keep crackers and water down.  And then I was on my way to recovery and some real food. I really had no major pain. Discomfort pain from surgery yes, but I was not in pain. I only took Motrin and even that I forgot to take half the time when I was home. The doctor and nurses kept coming in asking me for my pain level and reminding me I could have drugs at any time and I would just say 2 or 3 just to make them feel a little better but really it was more like a 0-1.  And that is pretty much it. We were in the hospital till Monday, then headed home for our new life.

Reflecting on a few things, my delivery room looked out at the cemetery and K commented later how ironic it was that we were bringing a baby into this world and at the same time a funeral was going on across the street. Cycle of life.

My reaction to her birth and the process. I wasn't sure how I would react, would I cry or not, how would the birth go, how would I feel? Now almost 1 month after her birth and I still haven't cried. Maybe it was the drugs in the hospital but I was so overcome with love that I didn't cry, funny I cry for all my friends babies births but not my own. And still, every time I look at Lyra I have this huge surge of love and joy on my heart and how lucky I am to have her. She really is my dream come true.

Best Birthday Ever! Catching Up!

Well, by my lack of posting I'm sure you've gathered that I've had our baby. So for this post I will do a little catching up.  On January 11th I went to the doctor for a check up. My platelets had dropped to 104 at my prior appointment so they wanted to check the baby to make sure she wasn't in distress, do another ultrasound and draw more blood. Prior to this appointment they had talked about inducing then they said no but after my platelet dropped to its lowest yet the doctor was a little more concerned. So at my appointment she said we could induce she said I could go in the night of the 12 or the 16th. I asked her if I could go in on the 13th so the baby could have her own birthday since mine was the 13th, the doctor chuckled and said they normally don't induce then but she would see what they could do.  Later that afternoon I got the call to be at the hospital at 7pm on January 13th.  My mom drove up on the 12th which worked about perfectly-no major snow storm that day. We went out to dinner and celebrated her birthday. 

On my 32nd birthday I woke up, had my favorite breakfast of pancakes then mom and I ran a few errands. We came home and I finished packing our bags for the hospital, had my favorite birthday dinner of homemade stroganoff and a big slice of chocolate cake. We snapped a few last minute pregnancy pictures then off we went to the hospital, we were running a little late which I would soon realize in next few weeks would be the story of my life with a newborn.

It's funny on our way to the hospital I sat there thinking 32 years ago my was doing this same thing on her birthday but she was in labor (which would lead to a c-section the next day) where I on the other hand had not had a single contraction or braxton hicks contraction and I was barely dilated to a 1. We were inducing.

Reflections & the Future

Well, here we are about 2 days out from my due date, our little girl could come at anytime.  It's funny to think that 32 years ago my mom celebrated her birthday then later that night went into labor and had me the next morning. Yes, my birthday is tomorrow.  I must say that with my brothers birthday being the 11th, moms the 12th, mine the 13th, I was shocked when we were given the due date of January 14th. What a little tradition we have started in our family. But here we go, no turning back now. She will arrive soon and our lives will be changed forever, our dream of being parents finally coming true.  I honestly can't wait.  Funny to think that a year ago, I was looking for a new job that led to the pregnancy.  My world had been turned upside down but in a different way.  K and I both celebrated our birthdays and talked as we always do of our hopes, goals, dreams for the year.  Here we were hoping for an adoption and discussing changing agencies while in the background a different plan was forming for us. Never in a million years would I have guessed last year, that a year from then I would be due to give birth to our first child.  I just didn't think it was in the cards for us. But here we are.

I love being pregnant but who wants to be pregnant forever?  I am ready to meet the little squirmy baby who kicks all night long and sleeps all day long. I can't wait for the memories we will make together. The mother/daughter bond that is so strong between me and my mom that I can't wait to build it with her. To see who she looks like, her personality, likes, dislikes.  I know from the moment she is born I will worry about her, her future husband, kids, etc till the day I die.  While children move out and grow up you never do stop worrying about them and wanting the best for them.  I also wonder what type of parents we will be. Pushovers? Strict? The perfect balance?  Will I be proud when I look back 30 years from now and know that we did it the right way?  Will we learn from our friends and do what we think is best whether others agree or not? K and I have some new roles to develop and define and I'm sure it will take some getting used to. 

Our world is about to be turned upside down but for the better, we are entering a new stage of life and I really can't wait.  So tomorrow my birthday wish is for the safe and healthy delivery of my little girl and that her grand entrance into the world and my recovery all go smoothly whenever she decides to make her entrance.